Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts

You Complete Me?

The phrase alone doesn't really sound logical. On the other hand, we all know exactly what it means because we know how it feels to long for, or "need" another person. But does this really mean that the other person 'completes' you? Let's look further into this.

It's a fact that we are all born alone (even if you're a twin or etc.) and we all die alone (even if you die with others). Your journey and experience is yours alone. Knowing this, how can you need anyone else to complete you?

It only appears that it takes another to complete us. In reality, it is always us as an individual, that completes us. To illustrate, when John and Jane met and got to know each other, they formed a great attachment to each other. They became inseparable. If any significant period of time had to pass without them being together, they would miss each other greatly. But the clues to why they feel this way also provide the answers we're looking for.

John has formed an idea of a his perfect mate. He had this idea long before he met Jane. Jane so happens to fit John's idea in almost every way. John's idea of Jane is his alone and only affects his experience of her. Even when John is physically with Jane, John only ever experiences his own impressions of her. He only experiences his interpretation of who she is, how she looks, and how she acts. So in reality, it is John's idea of how his mate should be that he is attached to. It's not Jane, herself, but the idea that John has of Jane. The exact same thing goes for Jane and how she feels about John.

People have convinced themselves that it is "other people" who make them feel the way they do. In reality, no one can "make" you feel anything. It is the ideas that you hold so close that truly affect your mood. If John should suddenly drastically change in behavior or looks and deviate from Jane's idea of what her perfect mate is, Jane would not hold him in the same regard. While the attachment might remain for a while, she would be stressed out or heart broken. Only after the attachment is severed would she feel relief from this stress. She would feel indifferent about John because she reclaims the idea of her ideal mate. Once reclaimed, she's once again ready to bestow it on someone else.

Realizing that it is only our own ideas that complete us, we can see that we really only use others to bring these ideas into the physical world. By concentrating on your ideal mate and feeling the abundance of their company (even if they don't physically exist right now) you can be just as happy and fulfilled as if they were walking beside you. In contrast, you could be in a relationship with your ideal mate right now, but if you are not appreciating them or are only feeling a lack of what you want, you will not be happy with them.

When you really think about it, you always have your perfect mate with you. Your perfect mate is an idea that you created and if you give it the proper attention, you can feel the abundance of this presence at anytime. Not only can you feel better by appreciating this fact, but it actually helps to physically attract a person of this nature to you.

Happiness starts and ends with you. Once you can be happy with yourself, you have an unlimited supply to share with others. A relationship works out so much easier when you have two whole people complementing each other, rather than two needy souls looking for validation from each other.

Related posts:

Feel The Love

Have you ever received a message, a gift, a letter, or any kind of reminder from another that made you really feel the intent of love with in it? I'm talking about that feeling of being filled with love to the point of overflowing from with in.

This has happened to me recently. It brought to light the realization that we can only ever feel what is already with in us. We always already have what ever we feel.

In other words, the fact that we can receive only a material reminder that can act as a trigger to release such great feelings within makes it only too obvious that the source of love was not external, but internal.

It can be likened to a faucet that we have inside. When opened, this faucet will flow out an infinite amount of love. This "love tap" is totally under our control, but we do not have control over it until we become conscious of it. While aware of it's existence, we can feel this unending flow of love overflowing with in us. While unaware of it, we unconsciously squeeze off the flow, believing the source to be external.

Ever realize that no matter how much they try, no one can actually make you feel their love? Some one can attempt to give you the world and unless you are in the right mood, you will not appreciate it. Once again, the source of all love realized by a conscious being is internal.

You only feel what is already there!

The only reason why you do not feel it at times is because you are closing off the faucet that would be gushing at full pressure all the time. The only way we manage to do this is to lose consciousness of this fact. And the only way we lose consciousness of this is to be overly influenced by the individual ego identity, getting caught up and trapped in the external illusion.

Don't think. Feel. Feel the love.

Related posts:

Be Mine

"Be mine, Valentine."
From these words alone, we can already see the dysfunction in the traditional view of romance.

The concept of possession is an extension of a person's identity. If an object belongs to you, in some way, shape, or form, it is an attachment. It becomes part of the ego identity. This is why all possessions are able to bring pleasure or pain.

Somehow, unconditional love has gotten all confused with attachment and possession. This gives rise to the illusion of a lack of love or feelings that oppose love. Love is our nature. There is no opposite or lack unless we are looking through the warped perception of the ego mind. It is only here that any loved one can be or do anything for us to feel a lack of love for them.

When we say, "Be mine," we are setting up a condition that will result in us feeling bad if it is not met. This condition says if you are mine and you stick to the concept I have in my mind of what it means to be mine, everything is great. But if you are not mine, then I will not love you and because I am still attached to you, I will feel pain. How crazy is that?

When we can let go and just love unconditionally, we are free.


Related posts:

The Peace Loving Warrior

A warrior of love? A warrior of peace? The concept at first, seems like a contradiction. How could a person who wages war be peace loving? Once you take a look at the answer, you may realize the question is more appropriate as, "How could a person who wages war not be peace loving?"

Peace and love are the only things powerful enough to fuel the intentions of a warrior. A warrior does not do battle for the sake of simply battling. The 'good intention' behind the fight is to experience peace.

If the experience of war is all a warrior desires, that particular warrior must still admit to finding a feeling of peace in the heat of battle. He may not call it 'peace' by name, but it is a feeling described much the same.

Warriors have often been looked upon with great respect as noble and majestic. Perhaps it is their spirit of acceptance and the embracing of tough situations that have given the concept of a warrior this stature. A warrior is a master at adapting to a difficult situation and therefore must be a master of being in the current moment.

In this regard, we can learn from the persistent and yet accepting nature of a great warrior. We can learn to be in the present moment and continue to stay vigilant when it comes to observing our own mind state. We can learn to win moment by moment our consciousness, focus, and experience. We can become masters of our universes.

Related posts:

One Love

Looking at all of the cultures, religions, and faiths of the past all the way to right now, there is a common thread that runs through them all. This common thread is part of the absolute truth that can never be denied.

The feeling of this truth is touched upon in so many different ways from so many different angles and yet, it is never quite captured in words. It is the quality of this truth that has attracted mankind to such concepts and institutions. It is because we are all beings of spirit and we can feel a connection to something bigger than us, even if this is not a conscious thought to us.

To be religious or to have any kind of faith in what is unseen is to feel the greater part of ourselves. Despite the differences in many cultures, the underlying fabric of being attracted to the peace within is always there.

Wars have been fought and people have suffered and died because of the differences, only because this truth has been manipulated for the purposes of ego identity. Once this ego identity has been transcended, all lines of separation start to blur. All that is left is the One Love that we all share.

Related posts:

The Love of My Life

People often refer to another person as the love of their life. Funny enough only you can be the love of your life.

Here's an excerpt from the book, "What Is Really Good?"

There are many people all over the world who are blissfully happy in their current relationship and may give the credit of their happiness to their significant other. There are also many people who are utterly miserably due to a current situation with a mate or an ex. They may also credit the other person for turning their life into a living hell. The truth is, they would all be wrong.

No one can make you feel anything. You experience yourself through interaction with others. We even acknowledge this when we describe our experiences.
If you are with someone you find attractive and has a great persona, you say, "I really enjoy myself when I'm with them." You enjoy yourself.
If you had to spend time with someone who you did not really care for, like, or found repulsive, you say, "I can't stand to be around them." You (yourself) do not find joy in their company.

In most cases, people have a relationship with themselves through other people. In other words, a person creates an idea in their mind of what the other person is or should be, and if their expectations are met, 'good' describes the experience of their company. If the expectations are not met, 'bad' best describes the way it feels to be in their company. In this way, we can see that it is all perspective and the only absolute truth is your observation of what is. How you interpret the observation determines your experience.

Relationships, in general, are great place to showcase the ego's identification with what a person's role should be with you. If a person sticks to the script that the ego has written; an attachment is formed and happiness, pleasure, gratification, infatuation, and 'falling in love' is the result. These feelings are all relative, however, because they are all borne of the ego's identification with what should be. They all come with the seed of their opposite ready to sprout as soon as the other person strays from ego's script. The happiness turns to sadness, gratification to regret, pleasure to pain, 'love' to hate, and infatuation changing polarity from positive to negative. The attachment remains for a time after the switch or the negative feelings toward the person would have no power. It would be more of an indifference.

The 'love' that Tina Turner sings about in, "What's Love Got To Do With It," is the 'love' of the ego's identification with what should be. The egoic 'love' really is "a second hand emotion." It is not the love of your true self. As a matter of fact, the majority of 'love' songs are of the egoic mind persuasion.

The egoic 'love' is relative while true love is absolute. The love of your true essence is never anything to be sad about. True love is unconditional. True love has no opposite. True love and acceptance is the natural feeling we have towards everyone and everything when we are conscious without egoic mind interference. It is the attraction we have for our true selves that we are able to perceive in all creation when we are in the present moment. It is the reason for sayings like "God is love" and "it's all love." It is the reason why people perform selfless acts and feel rewarded.

The ego's checklist of what a mate should be is what most people in the world are looking for in a relationship. There would not be such terms as 'trophy wife' and 'dream husband' if there was not a preconceived ego identification with what the perfect mate would be like. The very idea of being romantic or what your definition of romance amounts to, is totally relative. There can be as many definitions of romance as there are people you ask to define it.

People, more often than not, are looking for their happiness in and through another person. You can share good times with someone. You can share a lifetime with someone. But it is never the other person that is the source of your happiness. The source of your happiness and everything else you feel, is you and the way you perceive life situations. In other words, if you are not in the frame of mind that supports being happy; it doesn’t matter who you’re sharing your life with or what the situation is, you will not be happy. It is easier for most to believe that someone else is making them happy than to accept the fact that you can not be happy unless there is a level of acceptance. No body else outside of you can be your everything because you are your everything.




For more, read What Is Really Good? and stay tuned!

The Power of Light/Love

You can take a flashlight or a candle into total darkness and eliminate the darkness wherever you see fit. If you have mirrors, you can eliminate it everywhere.

Can you bring darkness into a room full of light? No. A little darkness can not exist surrounded by light.

In reality it's all love. It's all light. Love is the light. Fear is the darkness. Darkness is a lack of light. Fear is a lack of love.

In terms of how things have been explained in the majority of this blog and the teachings in my book; acceptance and adaptation of what is, is love and light. Resistance to what is, is fear and darkness. Don't let the words or specific terminology get in the way of the understanding that they are pointing to. Words can not express the true experience of the message.

This all goes to show how much more powerful light is than darkness. Love is more powerful than fear. Acceptance is more powerful than resistance. It feels really good to acknowledge this fact.

For more on these concepts, read What Is Really Good? and stay tuned!

Crimes of Passion

Broken hearts lead to crimes of passion. A person will lose their head and do something totally out of character because of a broken heart. A woman scorned, may break the windows out of her mate's car. A man betrayed, might attack his mate or her lover. But what is a broken heart? And what is it that possesses someone to loose their everyday composure and act so out of character?

'Heart' is often used as a synonym for the way a person feels at the core of their being. It goes beyond the calculating mind and refers more to the vibrational level of a person's consciousness. When a heart gets 'broken', it is warped or bent out of shape. It is disturbed from its usual way of being and thrown into a vast amount of pain and stress. You could say that a person with broken heart is a person who is in resistance to what is. They are in resistance to what ever the situation is with their mate.

Being in resistance to what is, is why people temporarily loose their sanity. The crime of passion occurs when the check list the ego has for well being is violated and the egoic mind goes into "stress mode;" effectively drowning out all logic to try and stop the pain felt by the bruised ego. It is as if a person becomes possessed in this moment by the concepts the ego is identified with. As as result, they may wonder, "What came over me?" or "What was I thinking?" after the fit of rage or sadness is over.

The thin line between love and hate only exists because there is a thin line between the true Self and the ego identity that we often think we are. To feel the love all the time in any situation is to shift from the perspective of the ego to the perspective of consciousness itself.

For more on this, read What Is Really Good? and stay tuned!

I Love You

A statement that means the world to some people and means next to nothing to others, "I love you," has become as ambiguous as the word love is by itself. But, as many other things in life, a deeper meaning can be seen in these words if examined with the right perspective.

When a person stops and realizes that the way they see and feel about any and everybody they perceive is actually a reflection of themselves; it can give them a profound understanding of themselves and the way they operate. As stated in the post, Synonymous With Life; you, life, and your experience are indivisible. They are one in the same. This is further illustrated in the clip Holographic Universe, mentioned in a previous post, Keep It Real. It illustrates scientifically what sages and philosophers have been saying for thousands of years. This is the fact that all that is perceived outside exists within.

When you say, "I love you;" you are expressing the love you feel within yourself, even though you feel you are directing the feeling toward somebody else. When you love somebody you are loving yourself. Of course this is true with any interpretation, emotion, feeling, or conclusion you come to about anyone that you perceive. It all exists within you as the beholder. (See Eye of the Beholder).

You can not love another person unless you love yourself. "I love you," is practically a positive affirmation. It naturally feels good to give to yourself through another person. The other is a reflection of you. It is the same as saying, "I love me."

For more on this and other topics, read What Is Really Good? and stay tuned!

What Is Love?

Love. It is a word used so often and in so many different ways that it has lost it's meaning. Or rather, it has not lost it's meaning, but gained so many meanings that it is now vague. It could mean so many things to so many people. It represents a feeling that words can not express. Two people can be having a conversation about love and never really know if the other person is referring to the same feeling that they feel themselves.

Some people describe love as being extremely attracted to a person's looks. There is the feeling of lust. There is infatuation. These are feelings brought on more by a person’s physical attributes.

There is the feeling of being attached or addicted to another person's company or way of being. The person loves the way the other acts and makes them feel. Of course, this is more of a personality attraction.

Funny thing about the kinds of love described above and a lot of other kinds not mentioned, is that it is usually a small step away from hate or another strong negative feeling. You know what they say; "There's a thin line between love and hate." All it usually takes to change a feeling as strong as 'love' into hate is for the person who is the object of affection to do something that does not comply with the subject’s idea of what they like.

If the physically attractive person gets fat or disfigured; they might become more repulsive to the person who loves them. If the person who is fun to be around changes their outlook on life; they might become a drag to be around. And on most people's list; there is probably an instant trigger to switch up the feeling. This would be if they feel betrayed in any kind of way.

The feelings described above are only a fraction of what is considered love. They mostly have to do with the love between couples. There is also the love of friends, family, and humanity in general. There is the love of nature, the love of self, and the love of a Higher Power. Though they all seem to be different kinds of love; there really is only one kind of love. Everything else is that love mixed with ego identification.

This one love is unconditional. It can never change to a negative feeling because it has no opposite. Love is total acceptance. A person is capable of loving everyone and everything with this unconditional acceptance. They may not agree with or necessarily even like a person on the surface level and still love them. This is the nature of acceptance.

To get much deeper on this topic and maybe even help with a relationship in your life, read What Is Really Good? and stay tuned!

Love Is Our Nature

What is love? The word love is one of life's great concepts that words can not express. It is interpreted differently by different people. We all have the experience of love though. For some it is an abundance of over flowing sensations. For others there may be a feeling of lack when they relate their experience of love. In either and any case, we as conscious beings have some idea of love.

I have realized that love is our natural state. It is where we came from. It is always there through out our existence. It is where we return. We only deviate from this natural feeling that ranges from contentment to bliss and ecstacy when our egoic mind fills our awareness with content.

This can be illustrated by the way cared for infants are usually very happy and easily amused at the slightest things. This is also illustrated in anyone who is able to stop the mind chatter that is so common among us and just be. The peace that is experienced is not something aquired, but simply uncovered.

Love being our nature may even be illustrated by people who are misguided by the egoic mind. At the root of every single thought and action is a good intention. This good intention is a desire for peace and love (which are really synonymous). You may or may not agree. That is fine. But think about something that you did in the past that you wish you had not or would choose to take back. If you think about your motivation for doing whatever it was, you may find that at the root of whatever self gratification may have been there; there was a desire for some kind of peace. The satisfaction you were trying to achieve is an intention to gain peace and love.

The egoic mind searches for love for its individual identity. The universal mind, free of the ego's control, searches for a way to reveal the love that is always there to everybody. Share the wealth; share the love, is the idea.

This is further explained in depth in the book What Is Really Good?
Can you feel the love? Stay tuned.